Procaffeinated
01 · Athlete Partner '26

Five athletes.
One year.
The first cohort.

Procaffeinated is paying five athletes to build the rituals that define a category.

02 · The seats

Five disciplines. One seat each.

EnduranceOpen

Runners, cyclists, triathletes, ultra. Anyone whose sport is measured in hours.

0 applications
MotorsportOpen

Drivers and riders. Sustained focus under load. Caffeine as a precision tool.

0 applications
StrengthOpen

Lifters, throwers, climbers. Power output, recovery, the long arc of a season.

0 applications
CreativeOpen

Artists, writers, builders for whom craft is the discipline. Output over hype.

0 applications
WildcardOpen

A discipline we have not thought of yet. Surprise us.

0 applications
03 · The brief

What this is. Who it's for. What it costs us.

What you get

£TK annual retainer. Paid quarterly, no strings on output beyond what's in the agreement.

Royalty on your Ritual — TK% of every subscription routed through it, for the life of the cohort.

A full kit drop and the gear you need to do the work properly.

Content support: a producer, an editor, a photographer when it matters.

Founder status on the app for life. The badge stays after the term ends.

What we expect

One signature Ritual, built with our team. It lives inside the app and carries your name.

Four pieces of content per quarter. Long, short, written, filmed — your call, but the bar is real.

Three public appearances or content collabs across the twelve months.

Honest representation of how you use caffeine. No hiding it. No overstating it. Specifics.

Who we're looking for

You are actively competing or operating at a serious level in your discipline.

You have a point of view. An existing audience is optional. An opinion is not.

You are willing to be measured publicly.

Who we are not looking for

Not influencers.

Not casual users.

Not anyone who needs caffeine to be the whole personality.

04 · The judges

Four people read every application.

TK
Mark Slinger
Founder

Built Procaffeinated. Reads every application first.

TK
TK
Founding partner athlete

Endurance. Announced with the cohort.

TK
TK
Founding partner athlete

Motorsport. Announced with the cohort.

TK
TK
External advisor

Performance science. Announced with the cohort.

05 · Timeline

Rolling intake. Roughly twelve weeks per cohort.

  1. Step 01
    Applications open
    Rolling intake
  2. Step 02
    Application window closes
    ~6 weeks per cohort
  3. Step 03
    Shortlist published
    ~2 weeks after close
  4. Step 04
    Final cohort announced
    ~2 weeks after shortlist
  5. Step 05
    Cohort begins
    ~2 weeks after announcement
06 · Apply

Make the case.

One form. No accounts, no logins. We read every one.

You'll get a confirmation by email.

Not applying? Tell someone who should.